Why does the whole prep thing seem to come so easy for some people?
I think I must just come to the realization that I am just destined to be fat….seriously…...i have been working out with weights every day….cardio, sometimes 1x a day…sometimes 2…my diet is around 90% good….yes I have slip ups and eat crap I shouldn’t but mostly i eat good….i pack my food, I get made fun of, I don’t get asked to go places because they know I cant eat, and yet I look like I haven’t worked out a day in my life! WTF???? My ass looks huge, I can grab fat on my back….im disgusting.
I see some girls who are weeks and weeks away from a show and they already look wonderful...i look like i haven't worked out a day in my life....my ass is big, my arms are skinny fat and i have a pooch that if my pants were tight, i would have a muffin top.
Now dont get me wrong..im not saying that im huge...i am still fitting in my 4's but i dont look like i step foot in a gym! Its really starting to get to me. My weight was down a pound this week which was nice to see...but i cant really go by that because my weight fluctuates so much its ridiculous!!
Does it really take somebody to be 110% perfect every day in order to see any results?
I have so many goals in my head...but to accomplish them is something different. I want to, but i think i would be more gung ho if i saw some changes.
Yes, i have done it before, but i guess me thinking that it was going to be easier this time i am learning is sooo wrong....
I promise this time though that once i get to where i need to be i WILL NOT gain back all the weight again....this back and forth bull crap is for the birds and is not worth it at all....because i think it gets harder each time....
Please help me stay strong and not give up....i dont want to fail myself and anyone else who has faith in me.
11 comments:
You remind me of me. We have the short height in common, we beat ourselves up, we can see our goals in sight, but we just can't seem to get there. But we will!!! I will say this, you were down to 117 a few weeks ago, that's awesome! I haven't got that low yet, I'm trying though. I'm stuck in the low 120's.
You said you've done this before, you were in a competition, you know how to do it, you can do it. Keep telling yourself that. You know what to do, you just gotta do it! YOU CAN DO IT!!!
Now, I have a question, because I'm curious, how much did you weigh when you entered your competition. I keep thinking in my head I need to loose 15 more pounds. Knowing we're the same height just makes me curious. I wonder what other 5 foot tall competitors weigh. Sorry if you find it nosey. Stay positive, and I certaintly won't give up on you, I love reading your blog, and you just hang in there girl!
Here's what is going to happen.(if I have a job) We are going to do KY Muscle again and NOT pig out the next day. We both know that once you pig out it keeps going for a few days :) NO butter cakes or jars of PB!!! :)
Hey there!
I SO understand what you mean. I'm currently 13 weeks out of my first show and I'm FREAKIN' out because the same f*ked up mind games are going through my head too.
When is your show?
I'm thinking of you and here to offer support to ya.
xo
its a head game, push through it. I am sure you look better than you think. Do you have a trainer or coach helping you with all this? have you been taking progress pictures?
We often lose our ability to "see" our physiques ourselves, so we need someone on the outside to honestly evaluate what is going on.
If at the end of the day you can honestly say you have done everything in your power to further your goals then you have to lay your worries down and rest.
If you are in contest prep you know that is does need to be 100% to look 100%. You can fool around in the off season but once prep starts you need to be spot on.
Hope I can give some insight because I hate to hear you beat yourself up. You're probably harder on yourself than anyone. I can't possibly believe you don't look like you even step into a gym. That's crazy! Now if you want to look like Ava Cowan remember she's been weight training for many years and is also a gymnast and she natural ability. Sometimes I wonder if looking at the fitness girls in those ads doesn't screw us up psychologically. We have to remember it takes lots of time and patience to get where those girls are but to anything is possible. Seriously though I didn't start seeing some real progress until I was lifting heavy. I thought I lifted heavy before but I got together with some friends, worked out a time or two to find out what I was really capbable of and I surprised myself. Find your absolute max and lift as close to that as possible on each exercise. You'll go through some pain but I promise it's worth it. Get a partner to help spot you to finish the last couple of reps and go to failure. Do this if you're not already. It will benefit you. Get someone to push you hard and force out those last few reps. Don't be discouraged! Size 4, your smaller than me!
The fact here is and forgive this mild and unusual bluntness, but you're talking absolute garbage.
If you look at the pictures of you from about 2 years ago and you look at yourself now, then why the heck are you being such a cow about yourself?
You are such a beautiful intelligent, physically capable Lady but you chose to waste your intelligence and wonderful mind, often criticisng yourself and treating yourself like some sort of nearly person, or some of faker, that will always be just short of a really big success and is trying to be someone they have no right to be.
There's people who have given 110% before to be where they are.
You should read about Ellie Simmonds. An Achondroplasic dwarf who at 13 years old, won 2 Gold medals for swimming at the 2008 Beijing Paralympics, against people that despite their physical impairments, were 2-2.5 times older, taller, potentially stronger than her.
To all intents and purposes, it looked like a great effort to get there, but a virtual impossibility to to even get a bronze
She also beat one of the world record distances she won gold in, by a whole 7 seconds.
Even she admitted afterwards she didn't think she could do that, (referring to the golds), and she'd only started swimming at the age of about 9 or 10.
Sometimes 110% is nearly always what you have to give, especially for someone that at least is probably a Mesomorph body type.
For Ectomorphs, they probably could slip now and again, but for you it will be harder but it's not impossible.
Only you can truly believe in what you think you're capable of. There will always be other peoples belief in you, but without your total and unwavering belief and commitment to yourself, you won't be the person or success you want to be.
Every time you have a chance to get up and train properly, or eat properly and you feel the urge to stay in bed, or not eat properly or make a flimsy excuse, tell yourself it's what an athlete who settles for second best would do.
Heck, there's people who give 110%, that never make Olympic teams, that live for the selection list and it doesn't happen.
They'll look back in their 40's and admit they didn't get it because they just lacked that extra few % of something that the chosen few did, but they can never say they did things they shouldn't have unless they did.
You're just being very hard on yourself and it's not fair to yourself to do that, it just makes you feel bad and feel a bit lacking in self worth.
Do yourself a favour Angela, just admit to yourself that you are a beautiful married woman and you CAN make this happen. Use your intelligence and credit yourself just once with being the person others know you are.
Don't be afraid to say look are good looking, don't be afraid to tell yourself you've done in the last 2 years, things to be proud of.
To me you have earned the right to be called an athlete, you've stood up on stage and paid the dues, but in your mind you'd probably never see what I see, so if you think you want to be called an athlete but don't think you deserve to yet, prove yourself wrong, not me right and prove to yourself you're deserving of such titles and show yourself there exists that extra few % inside of you, then if you never quite get the success you want, you can just say it's down ot judges not juding your exacting appearance the way you'd hoped.
They can affect your chances of success, so don't give them added incentives, by turning up 95% ready, becasue sacrificing a lot for dimished returns you helped to make happen to yourself, is scandelous. 3 months of slog for 3 hours or so of pretty much self imposed low ranking.
You're not second best, so stop acting like you are, and find the courage to admit to yourself you are what we see, and that it's not a trick of the mind.
You CAN do this, but only if you can give yourself total unwavering beleif and dedication.
When are going to start?
GOOD LUCK.
:-) :-).
Matt
I feel the same way. I work out everyday. I NEVER eat out, NEVER eat junk, "treats" ...nada. I still could pass for the girls who go out and get wasted and don't workout or care what crap they eat.
Are you working with a trainer or coach? If not, that might be the next step for helping you meet your goals. We all have self-doubt, and are our own worst critics. But you need to remind yourself of how wonderful, determined, and successful you already are. Just because you haven't met some arbitrary goals doesn't mean you should give up or that you're a failure.
Also remember that nearly everyone lies about their prep. Never believe someone who says it's "easy." Because it's not. Some days may be easier than others, but the whole process isn't supposed to be easy! If it were, everyone would be doing it!
I know it's tough (believe me - I know!), but stay away from the scale. Those numbers have such power over us! What really matters is how we feel about ourselves. Look in the mirror. Do you see a beautiful, successful woman? Because that's what you are! Other people don't care what size you wear or how your pants fit. They care about who you are as a person. This is a journey, and you're not failing. You're struggling, but that's normal. It's expected. We're human; not perfect.
If you want to see results fast, yes, everything has to be 100% ON. Cardio, training, & diet have to be strict and on point. If you want to approach it slower, then small deviations are fine.
Forgive yourself if you slip up, and then move on instead of dwelling on it. You CAN and WILL reach your goals. Keep working hard and hang in there. I believe in you!
I don't think prepping is easy for anyone to tell you the truth. I know that it is all mental and I feel exactly like you do some days. I do think that there are people that have better genetics than some and do better at this sport. I am not one of them, trust me. I have to be 100% for weeks on end to even get to where I will put on a suit. I have come to the realization that all 99% of women have cellulite unless they are just freaks of nature. I have not met a women yet that loves her body. What do you think you would look like if you were not in the gym everyday? You might be a little hard on yourself too. I am sure others see you differently than you see yourself too.
I haven't looked back since I started using kettlebells in my workout routine. It's now my favorite type of fitness activity. Anyone who is on the fence about kettlebell training - take it from me, it works!
If you get the time, take a look at the latest post on my blog and tell me what you think, thanks!
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