Im here...im alive.....just a bit busy.....this morning(well early afternoon) we went for our rings :)
Then we ran to a few stores....
I just got back from the gym....a strange thing happened...i actually emailed Tony about it, because it freaked me out a bit....i was doing bicep curls on the machine and i guess toward the end of the rep i was straining a bit, and i got this really sharp pain in my head, above my eye. It hurt so bad, i thought i was having a stroke! I had to stop and i sat down for a few minutes....it happened to me the other day too on one of the back exercises, but it wasn't as strong. I have had a dull headache for a few days, and then this....i wonder if its the lack of carbs???? Has this happened to anyone????
I was reading Beka's post and it really got to me (in a good way).....and i sat and thought about it....i really thought about it.....and i came to the conclusion that i do want this......the thing that throws me off is being scared about doing it....the getting on stage in front of people, falling on those heels, not posing right...those are the things that get me.....but i want to do this and not look back with regret.....i have the time, i have no children, i don't have a whole lot of money, but i make decent money, i just want the confidence and the mindset of a winner. I have never pushed myself before, and i think that is part of me being scared to take that extra step towards the unknown, ya know?
That, and people.....let me explain....i was at work yesterday and one of the ladies saw that i was looking at the figure suits......she asked about them, told her about me wanting to do a show, she saw the girls on stage, and said to me "you dont want to look like that do you?" I said "i would die to look like that" and she said that it looked gross and that they looked like men and there is no way that they dont take sterroids....i tried to explain that it is all natural, and you are tested in this industry, etc.....she didn't believe me....whatever......oh and then she said "do you think Adam would want you to look like that?" And i said "he would LOVE me to look like that."
Am i crazy for wanting this? Am I too old? I dont think so......but people are always going to say negative things, and i need to learn to keep things to myself, and not open my damn mouth all the time......when will I learn????
6 comments:
You know my feelings. I was the same way. I didn't "believe" in myself and once I started and did it I know now I can even be better! Of course people will say things but what is so horrible about looking fit? It shows hard work and dedication to yourself I think. I know everyone has their own opinions but I know how bad you want this and you will show them!
That is odd about the headache thing??? Be careful!
Angela...don't give in to the all the negativity out there. People are jealous and haters( as Tony says)..believe in YOU and what YOU want.
I agree with April...Get that head checked. we want you healthy girl, bigger than this comp is the fact that you are getting married soon:)
We love ya girl.
Let us know what he says, maybe you need to see a dr.
I hear that all the time too about not wanting to look at that. That, or I hear, why do you think you have to look perfect? It's not that, I just know I can improve, so why not???
I could write a book here but i will try to keep it short. I spent the last twenty years not doing it and now I will be 45 years old and I am going to do it. It does not matter how old you are at all as long as you can continue to stay healthy and it will keep you young.
I feel I have to explain it to people when they find out too because they think I am going to look like a man. Anyone that knows bb and figure comps know that you do not look like that all the time just at show time. When it is not showtime you will look like a lean, fit, sexy women who your husband will be goo gooing all over at any age. Don't put so much emphasis on what others think, do what you want and what makes you happy :)
Ignore the ignorance Angela.
I actually read once, someone saying they had been advised by their Mother, not to start doing weights or they would become a Lesbian with a beard.
The levels of ignornace about female genetics, muscle growth, appearance etc etc, is astonishgly bad in some cases. I put it down to the chinese whipsers effect.
A lot of people hear something, that at some point gets lost in translation, and by the time the umpteenth person has heard it, it's barely the same thing that came from the source.
If you want this, work for it, work hard at it, and keep believing in yourself. Plenty of people who know what your situation is about, and understand it, will give you the right words to read / hear.
The ones who don't understand why you want what you want, or don't understand it, are people to just ignore, as most of them could be told the stone cold truth 1000 times, and still not want to believe it, or become selectively deaf, to preserve their pride, and preserve their ignorance, because being proven wrong would probably crush their delicate egos.
You'll be whatever you want to be if you keep believing, and and trusting that you can do it.
You've got the looks, I KNOW you can have a body to match, and I know you can be the person you want to be, as long as you give a lot to yourself, and keep working at it.
Your goals are definitely in your field of capability, there's no doubt in my mind :-).
As for your strange physical anomelie, I would say it might be Carbs, or it's a water factor, or possibly some kind of Vasoconstriction issue, with a bloodvessel, but I can't be sure.
Anyway, I hope you find out soon, and I'm sure it's nothing too serious.
GOOD LUCK with everything, and best wishes :-) :-).
Matt
So scary about the headache thing. Hopefully it's nothing serious.
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