It is really hard to stay positive all the time. When you mess up and nibble on something your not supposed to, or you dont get up early enough to do your cardio, or you look down and see your fat roll on your stomach. You get down on yourself and feel like a failure. This is not how a figure competitor lives....she does not cheat, she does not have a pooch to look down at...she gets up at 5:00 am no matter how tired she is and how much her legs hurt. That is what needs to be done. So why do i do these little things that hinder my progress???
The honest answer is i dont know...i know i want this! I want to compete and i know what has to be done to get there. But i think what happens is that if i look at pictures of girls competing or on bodybuilding.com, and i see how good some of these girls look and they are ?? weeks out and they look amazing already...im not even CLOSE to that! I know it takes time and work and i am not expecting anything different....my whole thing is i sometimes feel that it is never going to happen...that i am never going to get to the point in my life where i say "damn i look awesome" (you know what i mean)....so maybe subconsciously i nibble or dont do the cardio, etc.
So i am 12 weeks out....Saturday is 11....time is a ticking....i am staying positive...i am getting my workouts in....i am getting most of my extra cardio in (more can always be done) and i will see what happens....that is all i can do...i am still pushing myself to be the best that i can be....and i am mentally trying to change my outlook on things...so instead of looking at my fat roll and get depressed, im going to look at it and say goodbye to it, because it wont be there much longer ;)
Ok....Im done being dramatic.....now back to normal....
I had chest today. Chest is not my favorite...it is actually my least favorite. I dont need any more chest than i already have..LOL! But i do it and i push myself and i try my hardest...that is all i can do right?
Tonight when i get home from work i have to run to the store to get some food in the house....and then i have cardio to do and food to cook :) Ah, the joys of competition!
3 comments:
Have you paid the entry for your show? Sometimes making that commitment helps. I don't really care for chest either, but now I look at my developed pecs and I love the way they look...the line it creates with my shoulder. I guess sometimes it just takes awhile to see the fruits of our labor. You can do it!
You are on fire Angela. I have noticed a different outlook in your posts ( a positive one!). Keep going, even through the mistakes and all.
Be strong and GOOD LUCK.
You have the looks for the sport, and you WILL have the body to match.
Chin up Angela, and don't lose heart okay :-) :-).
Matt
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